Don't Ever Let Anyone Make You Devalue Yourself

This segment explores toxic people in the workplace. Three traits are consistent among these chaos agents. Don’t let them get you down!

0:03

Good evening and welcome to my humble podcast abode. I am Coco Griot, just a 50 something who likes talking about life, love and a host of other topics. My favorite quote by Friedrich Nietzsche is "The higher we sore, the smaller we become to those that cannot fly". A recent conversation with a colleague made me think about this quote in depht. There are people that don't like themselves. You have no control, how inadequate or insecure, these people feel. Many times an individual will hate you because you remind them of their deficiencies. Now, this is not something you do on purpose, it just happens, you are just wonderful. You being you shines the light on the things they hate about themselves. So tonight, I'm exploring the topic of toxic workplaces. The traits that make a workplace toxic really boils down to the people. I titled this piece, shine, and continue to be unbothered, but that is not easy to do.

1:14

Our society thrives on competition. In order for someone to be the best, someone else has to be less than. This is drilled into our minds in many areas of life. But you know, in some places competition is just not welcome. How does workplace competition and envy affect performance? I'm not an expert, so I decided to do a little research and I want to share my findings with you. Please don't tune out. This might help you or someone you care about. I consulted an Inc. magazine article about toxic people in the workplace. It was super helpful. The first trait of the toxic co worker is they make everything about them. I mean everything. Let me give you a personal example of this. People were extending their condolences to someone who just lost their mom. I mean it was like in that week. The toxic person starts talking about how they felt when their mom died 20 years ago, we were speechless. It just took all of the energy out of the room and made the grieving person feel worse. When you ask the individual why they swear up and down, they were just trying to help by connecting the two experiences. No, you made it all about you. That is trifling with a capital T.

2:32

The second trait mentioned in the article is passive-aggressive behavior. There are so many people that participate in this behavior, They're committed to it. So, sarcasm, comes from the Greek word sarcasmos, which means to tear flesh. That's right. Those biting words have impact. Is it just me or do you sometimes notice co workers that will say something hideous and follow it up with, just kidding? They are saying what they want to say and trying to minimize the hurt by saying just kidding. The think rule applies here. T is it true? H is it helpful, I is it inspiring? N is it necessary? K is it kind? Okay, we are to think before we speak, but speaking is not the only way people demonstrate passive-aggressive behavior. If you're an organizational leader, pay attention to people that are always missing deadlines, that is a form of passive-aggressive behavior. What about the office chaos agent always spilling the tea about somebody? They are examples of passive-aggressive behavior as well.

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So the third trait listed in the article is the green monster jealousy and envy. These are accessories worn by the toxic co worker everyday. The really sad part is that while they are envying, another person's accomplishments, they are missing out on achieving themselves. It saddens me so much because this person will try to poke holes into positive things their co workers are achieving. I have this theory when it comes to blessings, the same God that blistered individual can bless meet. Lo and behold, I'm eligible. So I wrote a poem about envy, that kind of addresses this topic. Her little vial of empty once high up on the shelf. Beckons to her now, because she does not love herself. She grabs the bottle hurriedly no patience to ingest. Once again, she was reminded that she is not the best. How dare she upstage me? This phrase escapes her lips. As the heat intensifies between her rapid sips. The poisoned tasted quite bitter, and she is gasping frantically for breath. A lesson learned too late, she hated someone to death. Better is the enemy of good. Voltaire

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So thanks for listening this evening, and I hope you will continue to shine and be unbothered. And as always, I wish you good health, good fortune, and a goodnight. Cocoa Griot out.

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